Maybe this would fit better into Veteran's Day, but my family lost no one in war. I think about my father-in-law. We were about as different as two people could be. I am a liberal, he was very conservative (in the old sense) - more libertarian perhaps. He survived WW2, and NEVER spoke about it unless he was comfortable and in the right mood - even then it would be just a bit about one thing he remembered.

We were jacking up a settling fireplace and chimney when he told me about his greatest fear in the war. He was on a troop ship in the Pacific. A sitting duck for enemy subs and planes. There was no way for the troops to protect themselves other than to trust that the Navy convoy was well protected and lucky.

He began his service as a Lieutenant (he was an engineer), and we all thought he was released as a Captain. At his funeral, an in-law (ww2 veteran) was looking at the board of brass, ribbons and campaign badges that the grandchildren had assembled, and told us that he was a Lieutenant Colonel. He never mentioned that in his life.