Originally Posted by
hueyhoolihan
the threadless headset was invented as an act of desperation...
No. The threadless headset was invented as an answer to a common problem. That they happen to be a superior product is just a bonus.
Oddly, my old mountain bike's threaded headset stayed tight through years of off road riding.
Anyway, the OP is not pounding his bike off road. He is riding on gravel or just a rough paved road, and the headset comes loose every ride. If this was normal behavior, mountain bike forks would be falling off right and left.
The clamping nuts that I linked to were just 2 of a multitude of locking systems that you could buy because loosen headsets was a constant problem. You can still buy some of them today.
BikeFriday has a Cane Creek headset with a locking locknut and they sell the Delta Headlock for $8.
The forks can't "fall off" unless the rider is particularly clueless. There's a lot of thread that the top nut and the race would have to unthread to get to the point of a fork falling off. But if the headset loosens just a little, there is enough play in the system to bash dents into the headset races. Even a short downhill on a loose headset can ruin it. It was not an unknown nor a rare problem. And it is a problem that was solved completely and elegantly by the threadless headset.