Is there a rule of thumb on how much tension can differ between spokes before it is worrisome? 10%?
Yes, but it's changed over the years. First we said, all dish is bad, then when 5s went to 6s there was concern. But over time we kept pushing the rule of thumb ahead as we got used to the prior "craziness". These days the limit is about 2:1. But I don't know if this is a real limit, or just where we are now.