I am 33. When I was a kid/teen, I rode bike constantly; daily, pretty-much lived in the saddle all summer at that time. At 15, I had an incident in which a car struck my bike from the rear; I had been on the right shoulder, and I looked back, and saw a car that appeared far enough away, so I crossed the street.. after I crossed the double-yellow line, the car followed me over the line and hit my back wheel. It was a Doamondback MTB, and the only damage to it was a bent rim and somewhat-bent frame where the wheel attaches.. me, I had skinned knees (my butt had gone into the windshield and spiderwebbed it but didn't break through) and I had landed on the car hood, and rolled gently to the ground; very traumatic (never saw it coming.) I had no permanent damage despite being rushed to the hospital in an ambulance and was able to go home the same day.

I rode only a little after that before stopping forever until recently. I have about 10 one-mile rides under my belt so far and am dealing with the joys of getting back into it, since I lead a pretty sedentary lifestyle. That's another topic because something is concerning me.

I get frightened of cars approaching me from behind now. I sometimes flinch, sometimes cringe although they are of course not hitting me, and it sometimes causes me to swerve an inch or two (not like I am swerving out into the road..) but still. I hate this! I am trying to desensitize myself, but I live on a fairly busy street (although traffic dies out a LOT at night) and sometimes I resort to riding against traffic so that I can see approaching cars and hypothetically bail to the side if one should swerve.

I actually avoid my own street b/c of its being busy, and prefer the less busy sidestreets. I also discovered a rough old road nearby today that felt GREAT to ride because of there not being cars. I have a MTB, so the terrain is no trouble.

Brings me to another issue.. I testrode some hybrid bikes at the bike shop, which hypothetically should have been perfect for my needs (mostly road biking with some light trails.) I hated them. They felt topheavy, too-tall and weird, even with the seat at the "appropriate" level where I could tippy-toe the ground. I feel the NEED to be able to almost flat-foot when at a rest; the idea of not being able to do this fills me with terror. The bike I chose is a MTB like the ones I rode as a kid, and I can almost flatfoot with it. This makes me feel pretty confident about not falling off.. if I were to ride it with the seat higher, I would tense up and probably fall over.

Any ideas from those who have ridden before me on the path of recovering from similar issues? I am also a recmvering small-time alcoholic, and biking is one of the things I am fitting into the new free-time that I am not drinking. (7 months drinkless now!)