Dave?...Bill?....just thought I'd toss this out there...
I can relate to the OP's apparent angst...as I recall?...I was much the same (and still am to a degree but I'm working on it)...and now onto my point...
As a Former U.S. Marine, Hard working Machinist and 25 year married father of 3 grown daughters?....and outside of wrestling with addiction/alcoholism since my adolescent years?...it was a huge blow to my pride and ego to get diagnosed with TYPEII at age 52...it was hard for me to accept that I had become "Damaged Goods"....and even harder for me to accept the trauma of realizing the reality of my own mortality.
The depression was crushing...as in my mind at the time?...I too was doing everything right....not drinking...no drugging....no more partying through the nights and weekends....had been clean & sober for well over a year just staying home being a good boy and going to bed after coming home from my many 12 step meetings...and then I get hit with this chit?...closely followed with gobs of self pity and fear....along with thinking "i knew"...that a serious weakness had befallen me and that I was no longer....."A Whole Man"
My family making a big deal of things didn't help....I felt like I went from "Man Of The House" too "The New Baby In The Cradle"....my wife constantly scoffing at me anytime I ate anything (even though I was keeping a close eye on it all and only eating meats and veggies) harping at me that I wasn't taking care of myself and that I'm going to lose my legs and when I do she ain't pushing me around to my daughters doing things like ripping ketchup and steak sauce bottles out of my hand scolding me that "Look Dad!...There's Sugar In That!"
Talk about humbling?....did I feel "victimized"?....You Bet Your Brooks I Did! LOL!
Here's the things I learned and mindsets I've adopted along the way that might help the OP....
1. The first pill or shot is always the hardest to swallow and take.
2. "Living" is easy...it's the getting old part that requires strength and wisdom and IS what separates the men from the boys.
3. If you are reading this forum?..chances are you're over 50 years old...this is a 1964 Ford Falcon...
a 50 year old car....they made over 126K of them...how many do you see rolling around today?...and they were made of steel and iron....where you are only flesh and bone...so feel blessed.
4. Any body...just like any car?...no matter how well you maintain it and buy the best of fuel and oils?....sooner or later?...somethings going to break.
5. "Vegetarian": is an old Indian term for "Bad Hunter"...and millions of helpless living plants are mercilessly slaughtered by them everyday...stop the insanity! LOL!
6. Cowboys didn't pack celery sticks for that long drive....but they kept a close eye on their sack full of jerky.
7. I was a troubled teen...and I had a biology teacher who knew I liked bow hunting and took me to the side one day to explain to me...
"Did you know that you don't have to shoot a deer?...and that if it were running across a desert where you could easily see it's tracks that you could quite literally run him down?"
Explaining to me that because I'm a carnivore that the proteins I eat would fuel my body far longer than the nuts, leaves and bark deer eat and that the deer would exhaust it's fuel to run long before I.
BTW?....what is the average lifespan of a herbivore?...nevermind...I just googled it and apparently?...it goes by the size of the creature...for instance...while hippos and elephants can live upwards of 50-70 years?...gorillas only last about 35-40 years....and I would assume most of those live a vice and stress free life getting plenty of sleep and drinking nothing but water...and as the creatures get smaller in size?...they don't last as long...and gorillas are what?...3-4 times our mass?...enjoy that carrot juice there bunky!...I'll take my ribeye medium/rare! LOL!
8. It seems to me that Doctors over the past few decades have been very up in the air regarding cholesterol...at first?...none of it was good for you...then they went with the findings that there's "good and bad" cholesterol...and now?...many seem split over that as well...but the one thing I think is the worst thing anyone can do?...is to "Get Extreme" with anything as far as it relates to fueling the body....as I'm of the belief that suddenly switching too to low of an octane (or not enough) WILL harm your engine.
9. Survey Says!...10 out of 10 people don't get off this ball of dirt alive....and it's not always a quick easy trip.
and finally?...
10. When I help others?...it gets me out of myself...when I do my will?...I get consequences...when I do Gods Will?...I get results...10% is a lot too tithe...and not everyone can...but the retirement plan is out of this world!
Eat Healthy, Pedal On and Ride Safe! L8R, Bill.