MY $.02
"upper body strength is needed for controlling the mass" This used to be true, with older tandems, flexable frames and single bike frame angles and fork rake. A well built tandem will handle as well as a single. With the wrong rake even a single bike will handle like a truck.
Have to side with Mark on the more skilled rider should pilot.
I know a few teams that have the woman as the pilot. For one team I cut down an older Trek tandem, lowering and shortening the pilot compartment. ending up with a 16"x18" tandem. Also swithed from 700 wheels to 26" to help with the tow-over lap.
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Bentbaggerlen
"When the spirits are low, when the day appears dark, when work becomes monotonous, when hope hardly seems worth having, just mount a bicycle and go out for a spin down the road, without thought on anything but the ride you are taking." - Arthur Conan Doyle