I noticed that the o.p. said that her knees hit the grips. There are a couple of reasons that this might be. Here in Portland as many women as men bike commute. I notice that a LOT of them can toe it at stoplights without coming off the saddle. This seems to be how a lot of women like to set up their bikes. Technically it is incorrect. You really shouldn't be able (especially with the size feet that most women come equipped with) be able to stay in the saddle while fully stopped.

The Internet is good at a lot of things but teaching dynamic activities like bike riding stretch its ability to convey information. Carbonfiberboy's sincere efforts notwithstanding I think the o.p. would be well served to head over to a local Community Cycling Center where enthusiast volunteers can see her on the bike and offer help, critique or advice. Failing that she should (IMO) help us better help her by giving details of physical measurements of her and her bike. We don't need pictures (I don't). And I can't think of a more anonymous setting in which to get information. FWIW.