Originally Posted by
valygrl
heathpack - i have friends that used to be ride-friends that I had to transition into drinks-and-dinner friends when i started training harder. one of those people is now transitioning back to my recovery-ride friend.
There were other people who were just ride-buddies who it turned out we just weren't really friends off the bike. that's ok too.
just sayin' - save the important friendships, don't ruin them by running out of patience.
I have to say that I'm continually surprised how much I've maintained friendships with most of the core people from that original group. They have an anti-competition mentality, post stuff to their FB page along those lines. I respond regularly with comments along the lines of "competition is healthy" and I post a little bit about my experiences with the TTs and the training. I totally understand most people in this group don't relate, they tend to believe that bike racing is all about cutthroat competition, that the only way to achieve success is to mash everyone else down. I just want them to know its not like that, should anyone ever get an inkling to maybe give it a whirl. I try to sell it a little and to also bridge the gap with the local groups populated by racing cyclists, who I sometimes ride with.
Anyway, I get lots of support still from these people, comments about being "inspirational" and the like. And to my on-going amazement, people still seem to want to ride with me. I'm genuinely grateful to this group, it was just a little over two years ago that I did my first ever group ride and this is who I rode with. I was totally intimidated (and terrible), I remember the ride leader told me not to worry, she'd ride with me. And she did. Patiently. At the back the whole time. Sometimes I complain about the pace of these rides. In person, though, I try to push things but not destroy people. I think the expectation now is that I am the carrot, and it semi-works because people want to see if they can chase me down. Its the same reason I try to ride with the racer boys, to see if I can keep up and get a strong ride in. Yesterday just was a little more painful because one individual was late and was tired from the day before and needed the multiple stops, plus is a little fragile mentally so you can't get too far ahead. I was a little exasperated because if you're fragile + tired, I was thinking maybe you could make a point of at least being on time, so as to avoid that trifecta.
But I would get annoyed with that kind of stuff off the bike too. I think its the New Yorker in me. I hate wasting time, being late is just a huge sin in my eyes.
