I build all my own wheels. But, I worked in a bike shop before I went to college, so I was paid to learn some of that stuff.

Sheldon has a very good tutorial at: Wheelbuilding

I do not know anyone that owns a spoke tension gauge for personal use. I have had a friend measure the tension in mine a couple times, he wrenches at a local bike charity and has access to a gauge.

Some claim that they can build them up in very little time, and maybe they can. But once I get the wheel laced up I probably take 45 minutes to an hour to actually true up a wheel. Take it slow, patience is rewarded when it comes to wheels. When I am nearly completed, I usually am using only a quarter or eighth of a turn on each nipple. One of the best ways to mess it up is to try to be too fast at it and make adjustments that are too large.

I own spoke wrenches, no other wheel building tools. I true it up in the frame using the brake blocks as my guide (I use rim brakes). I do not think owning a truing stand is necessary, but they are nice if you can borrow one.

Unfortunately for you, the easiest wheel to do is an undished one. So, you would be learning the hard way by starting on a rear wheel.

I used to buy my spokes at a local shop that would measure my rim and measure my hub to determine what spoke lengths I needed, but they moved so now I no longer have someone to measure that stuff for me. That can be the hardest part, figuring out what spoke lengths to get.

I usually use Wheelsmith DB-14 spokes, but DT and Sapim also have many followers. I used Sapim nipples on my Wheelsmith spokes on my last set of wheels and was happy with the results.

Now, what is wrong with Deore? I am using older steel axle XT hubs (M754 or M760) and I have no complaints about the steel axle Shimano hubs.

You previously said you might get a dynohub, if you did that, there is an excuse to learn how to build up a wheel.