These kinds of posts always make me laugh. Perhaps it's that adults have more difficulty learning new things than kids. When I got my first derailleur bike at 14 (downtube shifters were all that existed then) it took 10 minutes to figure it out. I really don't understand why you're having trouble wobbling when shifting. Perhaps your bike fit is poor. Most people should be able to ride any bike with one hand while reaching for things (water bottle, snacks in jersey pocket, shifters, etc) without any wobble. I'm guessing that this is a very temporary situation and that soon you'll be shifting on automatic pilot like the rest of us.

As far as amount of shifting, I definitely shifted my brifter-equipped Trek (long since sold) more often than my downtube-shifter bikes, I'd say about 50% more. However, that's only because the ratios were closer so more shifting allowed fine-tuning. I shift both levers with either hand, more often the right than the left. If I'm going to shift both front and rear in one gear change I always move both levers with one hand.