True. You also have to accept that it's work. But If it seems way too hard then maybe you need some conditioning. Some of that is attitude. There's a certain amount of effort that feels "right" to me. But I can be my own worst enemy by possessing a preconceived notion of how fast I should be going if I'm to consider myself a "real cyclist". If I'm not pulling that then I try harder and get frustrated like I'm weak or something. When in reality I just need to slow down - and usually just a tiny bit.

If you're keeping a good pace and you start up a hill expect to require a slower speed. That's obvious but "something" might tell you that you should be able to just turn on the power. And maybe you can. But if you were making a decent effort then cut yourself some slack and slow down if you don't find that energy in your legs.

You can't go on how you should feel. Listen instead to how you do feel. Don't punish yourself for being less. You'll change if you ride a lot. You won't if you don't.

Wind is harder still because the resistance is less intuitive. Make yourself go up a gear and keep your cadence up without flailing around. Really take it easy until you feel a little silly because it's too easy. The gear lever is your friend.

And don't think about anybody else and whether they think you're slow.

In the end I think you'll find that up shifting however much you need to will make the ride easy. Call that your baseline. The key is to make it not difficult because you won't stick with it otherwise. Then make it a daily routine. You'll get stronger and stronger in a matter of weeks and your speed will improve.

Strive for the level of effort that seems right that day. Don't be in a hurry. Give yourself plenty of time. Sometimes if I'm kind of weary I'll tell myself to really goof off. After riding at what feels like a real slow and easy pace I'm consistently surprised that it adds only a few minutes to a 20 mile ride. More often, I feel slow starting out and tell myself to goof off and after 20 minutes of warming up I'm filled with energy and have fun pushing myself hard like I'm a kid again.

Above all don't have "bad" rides. The way you feel is up to you. Disappointment comes from setting artificial goals. If you're having a bad ride look at that in itself as a big red flag. I don't have bad rides. They're not all the same thrill but many are indeed.