My hands in all positions feel to narrow and I just haven't been able to get comfortable. My shoulder with, measured from edge of shoulder protrusions is 44cm. I have read that you should add 2 cm to that, however, I cant see needing a 46cm bar, that would just seem too wide.

Disregard the question about drop / reach. I was confused about something I had read on another thread, but after re-reading it and looking at your answer, I now know I was confused