Heh. I can't follow that act.
Closest I have is a ca. 1973 plastic fake Unicanitor saddle I got on my my first 10-speed bike, a Winchester, my 13th birthday present from my grandmother. In the pic, note the edge of the left skirt that has cracked apart and fallen away on the road somewhere over the years. Saddle has rusty rails, somewhat bent from 33 years of use and abuse by a rider who went from 80 lbs to 200 lbs over its lifespan. This 'souvenir' is still in occasional use, its on the
velo cheapo bike I keep at my in-laws place and ride five or six times a year