Never will get the angst associated with bicycle saddles.

If one wants to sit bolt upright, one needs one of those horrible padded and/or sprung thingies, because all one's weight is plunked on the 'seat' (or couch).

Otherwise, if one rides dynamically, choose minimal padding and then it's trial and error for saddle shape (flat; scooped; curved sides; cut-out or no) until one finds what suits one's sit bones/riding posture. Fine tune until the saddle disappears on long rides (50+ miles, let's say) -- done.

Find one that works -- buy two or three before they go out of production. When those are used up, go through the process again.

There's no magic, and there's no shortcuts.