Your situation brings up an important point. As our population ages, it is going to be critical that children of aging parents access information and resources BEFORE something bad happens. I know it's hard to sit down and think about this, but we all are going to need services and medical care before we die. As seniors/parents, we need to do what we can to make this easier on our adult kids. I send my son an updated document every other month with info on where I have accounts (no account #'s, those are in a location in the house he knows about and also in a safe deposit box in case of fire), and what personal assets I have that are of value (art, jewelry, etc.). He also knows where my will is, and my medical forms and insurance forms. I added the personal assets when I realized he was likely to just hold a huge garage sale after I die and take ten bucks for stuff I have that is quite valuable because he had no idea what it was! I am fortunate to have LTC insurance and that info, along with everything else, is accessible to him in print and digital format.
My son has taken the time to find out what resources there are for HIM when the time comes that he might need advice or help in dealing with me. We've had discussions about what we both want. There is no guarantee - I could feel fine one day and then be incapacitated the next.
Don't wait - talk to your family members, create asset and insurance logs, and make sure your kid(s) know there are resources out there so they don't have to deal with everything on their own. How many young people even know that such a thing as Adult Day Care exists?
Don't wait. Don't procrastinate. No one wants to be a burden on their children.

OP - I hope things work out better for you and you get some assistance.