Lots of things are shared on forums that we regret. I read your post and felt that it was an honest telling of how bicycling is something you're holding on to as a way of bettering yourself. Who here does not feel that way? Maybe you have to work through some things that go beyond BF advice, I know I do. I'm ok with what you shared. I only wish the best and hope you chime in again to let us know how riding has made you better, or how we can help make it so. Please, don't go away, lots of members here are pulling for you. Take a break if you need to but don't go.

RIDE ON!!!!