If it were not for my son feeling embarrassed about the cleanliness of my bike when we go riding, mine would be pretty dirty too. Don't know why that bothers him. I certainly can't tell how clean the bikes of others are when passing or being passed. But I suppose it's those few moments at crossings when stopped that count.
Maybe I be in trouble if he moves so far away we can't get together for a ride. But then maybe my wallet would have more left in it for "me" stuff.
Oh... cleaning is just what ever it takes to make it look good. Don't go overboard with special cleaners and stuff. Sometimes a damp rag is all that is needed. If spending time on cleaning and stuff makes you feel good, then fine. I've got a friend that loves to tinker with engines and electrical so much that when we went to go sailing, sometimes we'd sit at the dock for hours while he "tinkered". As long as the rest of us had beer it wasn't a big issue, but we missed a lot of sailing for "tinkering".