I'm glad we don't do firestorms on this sub-forum, because this kind of discussion is a lot less tiring.

My takeaway is that I'm going start installing crankbolts with a little blue loctite, continue to not carry a 14-mm socket, and optimistically assume that I will never have another loosened crank arm. Given that I've only had it happen two or three times in the last 40 years without loctite and am now 64 years old, that seems like a good bet.

I'm also going to continue to put a very light film of grease on crank tapers, mostly because I have some concern about galling. I have seen a few badly galled crankarm assemblies that were presumably ungreased, but have never seen a problem of any kind that I would attributed to the use of grease. Shimano obviously knows a lot more about it than I do. I'm not sure why galling is not a concern for them. (I would add the United Bicycle Institute to the list of authorities who favor the no-grease method of assembly).

I insist that my method is correct. I insist that dry assembly is also correct.

See Kipling, Rudyard: Poems - 'In the Neolithic Age'