Aside from the occasional abuse of empathy by a tiny handful of people, there is a difference between someone with a lifelong disability and someone newly limited by an injury that requires a cast, sling, etc. Many of the former with longterm disabilities have had time and mentoring to adapt. The latter with recent injuries may still be in pain and shock, depending on the injury, and haven't figured out yet how to adapt. I know I'm still coping only awkwardly with my busted up shoulder from being hit by a car in May. I still drop things and struggle to open and close doors when I forget the right arm is still injured. I don't like to ask for help and it makes me grumpy.

While riding the bus to the VA clinic last week the driver stopped for someone who was in a standard manual push wheelchair and also had an arm in a new cast. The wheelchair was of the type with smaller wheels, intended to be pushed along by a caregiver or attendant. It wasn't designed for traveling by the person in the wheelchair. Because of the impoverished neighborhood where the person was waiting I'm assuming it's all he could get.

He struggled to get up the bus ramp, but with only one good arm it was hopeless. I started to get up to help and realized I was useless -- my right shoulder is still broken and dislocated and I can barely lift a coffee cup, even months after the injury. The bus driver reluctantly got out to help push the wheelchair up the ramp.

The regular city bus drivers don't normally assist disabled people on and off the bus. Those folks are supposed to have caregivers or use the special buses for people with mobility impairments. But many disabled folks retain a lot of independence and persist in trying to use the regular city buses. In fact, years ago there was a scandal when several disabled folks, including my mom, fell off the buses and were simply abandoned by city bus drivers, left lying in the street or curbside. My mom was rescued by a passing family in a large vehicle who helped her up and to her apartment -- mom couldn't even thank them properly because they spoke only Spanish and she spoke mostly English, although mom's Spanish is better than mine. After that I took over as mom's caregiver because her in-home aides should have been accompanying her on those bus trip expeditions to shopping, but the aides would all bug out early. And mom soon after qualified for the city bus service's mobility impaired transit service, which has proper mechanized lifts for wheelchairs, and drivers who are trained specifically to assist disabled folks.