Fit
Posture
Core strength

These work together to provide ride comfort.

Poor posture can be caused by poor fit or just not understanding how to ride. I was experiencing neck pain and hand numbness. My bike fitter made some small adjustments to the seat height/position and my cleat location but also observed that I was hunched over, scrunching my shoulders and putting too much weight on my hands. Along with the fit tweaks, adopting a more "athletic" posture resulted in a much more comfortable ride and no more neck pain or hand numbness.

Core strength will help with the tendency to put too much weight on the handlebars, allowing the better athletic posture and a lighter touch on the handlebars.

Perineum pain is very likely a fit/seat position issue.

Definitely see if the bike can be fit. A good fitting will cost $150 minimally, and should take a few hours. Maybe you don't need a new bike?

If you do end up looking for a new bike... A carbon frame, disc brake, Shimano 105 will list in the $2500-2800 range but look for last year closeouts and you should find something in the $2K-2.2K range. Examples:

https://www.rei.com/product/145815/c...-105-bike-2019

https://www.giant-bicycles.com/us/defy-advanced-2