Wheel size should have little bearing on drivetrain wear. If you're shifting to your small ring too late into a climb when drivetrain is under heavy load, that can cause suck--get into it earlier and/or back off pedaling pressure just before a downshift--same with cassette shifts otherwise you risk breaking teeth. As far as cassette cog wear, I assume it's your lowest gear, i.e. the most used one and under the most torque. I go through one cassette and two chains per year myself. Wax-wise, I find they burn off too soon except for Squirt brand--I get 3-4 rides between lubes even in dusty so cal conditions. Lastly, I never get chain suck, I run 1x :-)