Don't be sorry honestly these are the kind of responses I was looking for. I feel like my saddle height is correct I used the pubic bone method I found on the RivBike website recently and the number I got told me to jack it up a bit, the butt pain has been a better since (could be placebo), but on longer rides it creeps back even when wearing padded shorts. My fore-aft I've just been guessing and adjusting as I ride like if I notice I'm sitting a little more on the front of my saddle instead of the wide part.