I am unwilling to get surgery until it cannot be avoided. I know I have abused the knee (mostly through twisting, and then through pushing it when it hurt) but it is not replacement-ready just yet. It is more being sensible. I was young and stupid well into middle age, and now i have to pay the price.

Worse still, I have been a streak rider .... a few years with big tours and high mileage, then a few years with lung infections, mental stress form job loss, broken (and twice rebroken--did I mention I could be stupid?) collarbone .... the past two years (prior to 2020, which we all know has been a truly super year ) were pretty low mileage---coupled with less gym time---which has really set me back and made me vulnerable to my own stupidity.

This month has been okay, with frequent if short and slow rides .... but I twisted my knee again, then rode it a little hard (it was fun at the time) and it felt pretty bad the next morning. I don't think I did Serious harm-- I see it more as a warning, with my body getting sick and tired or being abused.

I did pretty well today, and even did a couple short but (for me) steep climbs (what most folks call "barely noticeable gradual inclines") and I was really careful to spin with utmost care and push hard with my right leg. I actually felt better after the ride than before .... my knee muscles hurt, but the joint isn't complaining much.

I appreciate the concern everyone has shown. And I sincerely hope that my life allows me to get back to the kind of riding I used to love.

I was talking with a friend Friday morning who was telling me about his new friend, who is way into cycling, doing 60-mile rides weekly .... and he suggested I connect with the guy. I am not sure if this was the universe mocking me, or the universe encouraging me to stay the course, build slowly, be Careful with my aging joints, and eventually get back to where I was.

I almost cred (well, that is a gross exaggeration) when my friend said "he rides like, 60 miles at a time---you used to do that, didn't you?"

Yes, son .... back in what we now call "The Good Old Days," a few years ago.

That's why I over-react to posts here sometimes ... What used to be a healthy urge to go a little farther and faster each week, and log a minimum of 300 miles each month, has devolved to making it through a few 15-mile rides a week. I am actually slower now than when I first got back on the bike after eight straight years of intense overeating and sedentary living. I am slower now than when I got out of heart surgery.

Bitter? Only when I am awake.

LOL .... never take me seriously ... i don't.