Originally Posted by
burnthesheep
I don't know how to get people to change behavior like this. It's not a huge deal, but I find it really disrespectful that my wife will "clap" her hands our kids when she has certain things to say to them. I don't know, they were doing something wrong. Whatever. But I just find it disrespectful for some reason. And she's also done it at me before. I pretty much left the house when that happened.
Is that something you'd consider disrespectful? Audibly clapping your hands at somebody while you're sing songy chanting something at them?
It's a rare occurrence, but whew.
That's the kind of thing one woman would do to another about 5 seconds before they'd start pushing and fighting back in college.
To each their own. Yeah I wouldn't respond well to it but my wife shuts down whenever I raise my voice. I was raised in a house where if you wanted to be heard you yelled louder than the others so my volume is directly related to how intensely I feel about something. To her she shuts down immediately when I do that and that's the end of the conversation. I get it. It's frustrating for me because that's just heavily programmed into my ways of communicating.
Not saying that is programmed into your wife to communicate that way but I would say your response seems similar to my wife's response to me.
Your thoughts and feelings about it are valid. Discuss it with her.