Here’s how I’d kind of hoped the whole transaction would unfold, and maybe would have, if I’d gone to a local yokel…

Bubba’s Bike Emporium: “Thanks for calling Bubba’s Bikes, Cleetus speaking, how can I hep ya?”

Me: “I want a Level 1 tune up on my wife’s Trek bicycle.”

Cleetus: “Alrighty, let’s check the schedule… [hollering in background] Hey, Bubba, can we fit in a tune up?... Sir, we’re scheduling about two weeks out. Can you bring it Tuesday the 6th?”

Me: “Sure, see you then.”

Fast forward to appointment day, Me: “Dropping this one off for a tune up. I believe I have an appointment.”

Cleetus: “You sure do. It’s gonna be 80 dollars. We’ll get right on it and call you if we find anything wrong.”

The next day, Cleetus: “Hello, sir. Bubba’s Bikes calling. Looks like your bike needs a new chain.”

Me: “Good catch. How much will it cost?”

Cleetus: “Normally 25 bucks plus labor, but I can trim off a few dollars since you have us already doing the tune up.”

Me: “Okay, I guess that’s what we get for riding on wet, salty winter roads. Please replace it.”

Cleetus: “That’s right. We’ll get her done, and you can pick it up tonight. We appreciate the business, so please tell yer friends about Bubbas.”

I don’t know, maybe Trek just isn’t “folksy” enough for me? I respect professionalism, but was a little put off right from the first conversation with them. I called to inquire about their lead time for basic service and was told “It’s currently two to three weeks, but I can’t even put you on the schedule until you bring the bike in for us to inspect.” I thought, “Wait, did I dial wrong? Seems like I got the DMV.” And it got worse from there.

One more example I’ll share about their elitist attitude. The mechanic I talked to on my first visit asked how long it’s been since I refreshed the tubeless sealant. I said, “I installed those tires last fall, like six months ago, so maybe I should add another ounce of sealant in each?” He sneered, “Oh, I dismount my tires, clean out the old latex residue, and start over with all new sealant and rim strips (!) every three to four months.” Seriously? It was at this moment I realized I’m dealing with some bike snobs. Do any real people have the time and money (or feel the need) to completely re-do their tubeless setup three or four times a year? Or am I the one who’s crazy?

Thanks to everyone for chiming in on my rant. I don't know if I expected to be validated or to see my attitude realigned as I consider your perspectives. Seems like I got a little of each.