You will receive a lot of opinions that will be all over the road. For us, we're are 400 lb team also riding northern NJ roads. We have 3 road tandems and run Gator skin 28's on 2 of the bikes (one conventionally motivated and the other electrically motivated) and we put 38 Maxis Ramblers one the third bike for riding the rail trails. I like the gator skins for the flat protection they offer and I like the wider tires for the comfort. That said, the 28's also roll faster and are more fun on the road and the wide tires roll slower and are more comfortable off road.
We did only get about 1000 miles out of the Maxis tire in the rear and I replaced it with a Gravelking 35 and that seems to be wearing well after about 1000 miles as well.
All that said, I would not go for a super lightweight tire but would suggest going a little wider (say 28 min) than you might for a single. I would also recommend not push the low pressure trend too low as there is a lot more weight on the wheels.
Probably anything you would ride a single on the road will be fine.