Originally Posted by
rsbob
Hang in there and you are doing the right thing. Several studies have shown that getting out in nature (hiking, cycling, skiing, going to a lake/ocean/river) have positive and restorative effects. Achievement is nice but it is not the end-all be-all of being outdoors. It’s just getting out there, moving and enjoying nature.
Your dreams are helping you and showing you there are some real positives. When it comes to classic cars, take it from me, it is far better (and far less expensive) to dream than to own. The chase is always the most exciting part anyway. So keep dreaming and keep living the bicycle dream and you will be alright.
Thanks! I acted on that dream and made it real. Except on the classic car for obvious reasons.
Achieving "A to B" on the bike, doing centuries. Felt great for a while. But still couldn't compare to achieving something in life like getting married, having kids, having a stable job, and a house of my own. I have none of those and drowning in debt on top of it. I have a bit of mental and psychological shortcomings from a traumatic injury to the head when I was a kid. I just couldn't perform as well as everyone, I couldn't keep friends and you probably need these just to get anywhere in life. I have so little incentive to go on living, the reason why I tried to kill myself over the years.
For now, cycling is an effective distraction and probably the best temporary solution I found. But the emptiness is still there. I've tried religion and faith, already, that didn't worked either and only made things worse.