I like to use the least torque that holds the components without slipping. That's often 20-30% lower than the recommended max.

I have an aluminum post in a carbon frame. That range of 6 nM works fine on my bike, no slippage. (I'm probably at 4-5 nM). I put a narrow tape strip on the post, just above the frame, to monitor for any slippage.

I use carbon assembly paste, which works great. My tube of Tacx assembly compound is 12+ years old, and I still have half the tube. It's a gel with tiny plastic grit particles. ( Tacx seems to be unavailable? The Park Tool Supergrip looks like a similar gel. )

I use the carbon paste on my aluminum stem to aluminum handlebar too. Note--carbon paste will dull the paint that's within the clamped area, the tiny particles are digging into the paint. That's just cosmetic, of course.