So sorry for all you have been through. Most of us have no idea how that could feel. During the Thomas fire , we waited , filling our truck with boxes and readying our pets . The fire was coming , it started about 5 minutes by car from our house .I talked to the police as they were directing people out . We were told to stay until notified so traffic would be controlled. It was midnight when the knock on the door came . As we drove away with flames within a block of our home and wind blowing crap everywhere , we did not know if we would have a home to return to . That feeling , and fortunately for us it was short lived as our home was spared , is like no other. We stayed in our motorhome at my shop until we were allowed to return . I remember the ride “home” not knowing if anything would be there . I hope you somehow move beyond tragedy and loss to a better place . I cannot imagine what you have been through. Take care….