... he beats the bus in his first commute .... at 411 pounds <huhenio walks out of the room in shame, while scratching his spandex wrapped butt>

You just made my argument of public transportation sucking in the U.S., and you just got your first kill.

I hope the people that did not want to seat next to you on the bus saw your dust from behind.

You are probably one of the fastest 400 pound plus guys in the planet too.