If I ever have to put a bike down, I want to make it just ridable, and then take it to the biggest ravine I can find (I picture up on Mulholland in LA, although I've only ever seen it in movies), and ride that **** over the edge, jumping off at the last minute. If I'm lucky, a) I can fake my own death for a little while, and b) it will blow up on impact.

Either that or I can chop it into a freakbike.