Thanks, everyone. I've had an Attitude Adjustment and feel better already.

Somehow I managed to puzzle out the problem with my email, and I've restored the database, so all's well in that arena.

I called for an appointment with my eye doc, and discovered he's on vacation until Monday, but his parter (who does lasik!) can see me. Had to fight the urge to have a meltdown when the office manager's first question to me (I'd left two messages overnight) was not "How are you?" but rather, "What kind of insurance do you carry?" She furthermore said without proper insurance I'd be, in her words, "treated like a walk-in" and God knows what THAT would mean to my bill... Anyway, got her supervisor on the phone and got it straightened out and began to feel like a person again, not something attached to an insurance card making it okay or not okay to talk with. (Poor grammar, forgive me.)

I'm having to wear a patch temporarily on my eye, under the glasses, so on top of getting used to the glasses, I have to get used to no binocular vision for a while. I'm pretty sure this will keep me off my bike today in the interest of personal safety.

But, as everyone pointed out, Stuff Happens, and I've come to realize there was no Vast Right Wing (or even Left Wing) Conspiracy against me so the Stuff would Happen on my birthday. I am indeed Happy To Be Alive!

And, as was also pointed out, I can ride this weekend! And so...

THANKS EVERYONE!