Great report - sorry to hear that the slowpokes/out-of-shapers cramped your style a little bit - the price of being nice, I guess. Props to you for sharing your food! If I ever ride with you, I'll make sure I'm even remotely in shape, or at least not ask you to ride with me or wait for me.

Sucks to hear about the food - I've never done an organized ride, but I can imagine that good food is one of the things one should be able to look forward to following a hard day's ride . . . cut up bananas and water? Not even a sports drink?

And every time you mentioned party boy, it reminded me of that goon from Jackass that wore a pair of briefs and a bowtie and that was it - he'd go around grinding on people, dancing in public places as if he were his own portable party. I imagined someone like him on a bike . . . huffing and puffing trying to keep up with you . . .