Contrarian view here...I'm the experienced roadie & hubby not so much. Out of the blue last Oct. he started researching tandems (actually, I think he wanted to share the fun that my friend, her hubby & I were having with club rides and centuries). We talked to our local dealer, borrowed one, road 8 miles mostly uphilll one way, and decided coasting for home that this was for us. He had no experience as a captain; I had 2 rides as a stoker, but we knew in a visceral way that this was for us.

Fast forward 3 mos. and about 500 mi.: The bike hasn't changed -- oh, yeah, we have new saddles, I have extensions on my bars, but essentially it's the same bike. My husband has taken being captain to heart & is open to learning, has learned to cue like crazy, and has taken on some of the toughest hills in 3 counties, no questions asked. If I say we can do it, he believes it & makes it so.

As his stoker I hang on for the wicked fast downhills & put out whatever effort he asks. That isn't to say I won't mention some quick changes he makes, but it's all part of the learning process. Remember -- it's a process, not an event.

To wrap it up: I advocate patience on both parties' parts, and a sense of humor. Remember, if it isn't fun, it won't be done.