caloso, points to you for letting him off the hook when he said, "You're lucky my wife is here." I would have been very tempted to say, "Your wife APPROVES of that kind of driving?" Or, even better, "You're lucky MY wife ISN'T here."

Oh, I just thought of another! When he was doing 4 mph down the road, catch up to him again and say, "See? THIS is how you should drive through busy residential neighborhoods! I knew you'd get it!"