What a great topic. I understand your wife's concern. I commute about 5,000 miles per year and am often in heavy traffic. Although I admit that many of the topics posted about here are discouraging, they have actually served to make me a much, much safer rider. As a result of these forums I have learned some very critical safety lessons without having to make the mistakes myself.

For instance, I have learned that when a gap exists in a line of cars I am passing, it only exists for one reason; to let cars through. So I slow down wether or not I see a car ready to move through the gap (left cross or right cross). I have learned that it is possible to ride thousands and thousands of miles in traffic without incident if you pay attention to basic traffic behavior (objective hazards notwithstanding). Additionally, I have learned that I will never be on the right hand side of a car through an intersection regardless of wether or not that car has signalled intention to turn right.

I have learned a new way to think about traffic and its flow. For instance, I have come to understand where a driver is likely to look for hazards before entering a roadway or lane and what hazards he is looking for. To this end, I have come to understand that a driver will NEVER check for a wrong way cyclist whether on the road or the sidewalk. I have learned how to negotiate very tricky areas in traffic such as a long and high speed right hand entrance lane to a freeway that you have to cross to go straight.

I have learned how to assert myself as a traffic vehicle and to more gain respect and cooperation by doing so. I have learned how to respond to frustrated drivers in a manner that is most likely to result in a postive result and least likely to result in aggression.

I can't tell you how many times I have been able to recognize a potentially hazardous situation because I had read about it on the forums and was ready for it. Some of these lessons would have taken much longer to learn and would have been gained at a much greater level of peril to myself without these forums.

Rest assured, most of us travel safely day in and day out but when we do make a mistake, we post it here so that others don't have to learn the hard way.

After many thousands of commuting miles, I am convinced that with the exception of ojective hazards (the extrememly rare case of being mowed down from behind by a text messaging teenager, for instance), bike commuting is a very safe and fun way to get around. I am also convinced that, for the most part, your safety as a bike commuter is in your own hands. There is much you can do to ensure that you won't be at the wrong place at the wrong time and going the wrong rate of speed. These forums are a wonderful asset for commuters.