My dearest Noob,

Stop trolling dumpsters, thrift stores, garage sales, and your friend's and family's basements for "vintage" bikes. Yes, there are gems out there. But, most are turds. And you know what they say about polishing turds.

Hey. All you want is a sweet ride, anyway. Right?

"But, I want something unique to me..."

There is plenty of room to be unique by using bikes made within the last decade or two.

"I don't want to buy new."

No, you don't have to buy a brand new frame and brand new parts to make a sweet ride. But I do strongly suggest starting with a good foundation, especially if you are starting with nothing and have your heart set on "building my first bike" as opposed to supporting corporate greed by buying a bike from a multi-national.

"I'm not starting with nothing. I already have this old bike..."

Yeah, that bike you pulled out of the dumpster pretty much equals nothing...it's actually probably negative-stuff. Now you OWE the universe. Beware of free sh*t.

1: Older does not mean better.
2: Old as sh*t does not mean "Vintage". It just means "Old as sh*t".
3: "Vintage" doesn't necessarily mean great, or even good for that matter.
4: "Vintage" was probably introduced to the fixed-gear crowd as a way of luring suckkas. Like "Digital" batteries and "Ladies" razors (add a 25% premium for both).
5: The "Vintage" bikes that you guys are pulling out of your grandparent's garages, dumpsters, and thrift stores are probably Wal-Mart bikes from 20+ years ago. yaaaaay.
6: It's in the dumpster for a reason.

This is not directed to those that, for some only-god-knows-reason, are in love with some only-a-mother-could-love frame. There is no hope for those guys. Just the dumpster divers and the thrift store regulars who expect to have a good experience with all of this.

The crux of my argument is: If you are building a track/fixed bike from scratch or just a handful of ingredients, start with a good track or fixed specific frame.

"Oh, but I already have a bike with a cranks, BB, and a front wheel from this dumpster bike."

They are probably crap. Most people with nice bikes KNOW they have nice bikes and try to sell them (or unload them for ungodly prices to unwitting noobs) before throwing them into the dumpster.

(I love analogies)

It's sort of like if you are making dinner and you use what you got in the fridge and cabinets to make the best meal you can. Sometimes you wind up substituting one thing for another because for one reason or another you can't get to the supermarket for the proper ingredient. But who in their right mind would go to the supermarket and buy the replacement ingredient and bypass the proper ingredient...especially if it's the MAIN ingredient?

It's one thing if it's not a big-deal dinner. Like, "It's just Wednesday night and I need something in my belly". This would be the equivalent of a spare, Franken-bike, beater made of spare parts. But, not your big annual Thanksgiving/Christmas type dinner (meaning your main or ONLY bike). For that, you want to start with the best turkey you can afford. Not the $5 turkey-esq stuff from 7-11. Be patient and save up for a good Turkey or Ham. It's worth it. Trust me.

Now think about this...if you are going to spend the same amount of money on the other parts of the dinner (veggies, desserts, bread, wine, etc...) (Translation: cranks, wheel set, stem, bars, etc...) and don't forget that it takes the same amount of your precious TIME to prepare the complete meal (bike). Then why skimp on the Turkey?

A little planning goes a long way.

"Aren't conversions supposed to be cheap?"

Well...there's the cheap way then there is right way.

They are supposed to be cheap, but usually aren't. I watched as a friend sunk $800 in parts and labor to convert a not-so-special 80's Bianchi road bike. That's not counting the cost of the frame. She was NOT happy when she got the bill. Even if she did the work herself she still had $600 in parts to pay for.


"But I heard that it's soooo easy..."

Yes, there is this story (that I have dubbed "The Hipster Myth", BTW) about how once, some guy got a bike from a thrift store for $5 and made a conversion in 15 minutes by adding only $50 in parts and he was skidding that night. Yeah. And you can hit a full-court basketball shot, too. But both would be ugly, unreliable, and unlikely.


"But, Carleton, we aren't as rich as you. ".

I know, noob. Don't worry.

If you do need to cut corners then cut corners on the accessories that that can be easily upgraded later.

Here's a little secret:
(Whisper)
Buy a nice to very sweet track frame then buy a crapload of components for super, duper cheap from the Pista, IRO, Fuji, Langster, Capo, etc... owners after they upgrade. Those stock parts from $500 bikes have little to no resale value on the used market.

- If you can't afford the Dura-Ace crankset right now get a used stock set from somebody's Pista for hella cheap.
- Can't afford those Phil Wood/Deep V wheels? Ride some stock Langster wheels for a while.
- Stock steel Deda bars from a Pista are actually decent and can be had for like $15.
- Post an ad on craigslist like, "WANTED: Stock Pista Wheelset - $50". You will have a complete wheelset with tires before the end of the day.
(End Whisper)

"Why not buy nice parts, then upgrade the frame later?"

Well, noob, because many of the nice parts you buy will be designed to fit your non-standard conversion. Then when you finally get your nice frame some parts won't fit and you will have to buy them again.


"But, I want to Lurn."

When it comes to bicycle assembly, care, and maintenance you will learn the same amount from any bike you build from the frame up. The biggest lesson you will learn is that it's a lot easier to build a bike when you have the proper parts.

"How do you know all of this?"
I read the internets, son.

Actually I've:
- Converted 4 or 5 bikes
- Owned 5 or 6 track/fixed specific bikes
- Owned 30+ bikes in my life
- Worked at a few bike shops
- Owned and modified 10+ cars (the same principles of upgrading and modifying apply)


"Why are you telling us this."

I don't want you guys to get so discouraged during your build and give up on cycling. I've noticed several "I was building this conversion but gave up..." for sale ads on CL lately. Yeah, it's a fad right now. But, that fad could attract some lifelong riders that didn't ride before.