Actually, you don't really have to.

After a while now of reading and posting in the "Commuting" forum, I've noticed that several topics seem to be recurring flashpoints of contention, some of them becoming quite bellicose. In no scientifically derived order:

Frame material: The reliable tried and true armies of steel clash (pun intended) with the inflexible forces of aluminum and the innovative light infantry of carbon.

Rivendell: Godsend, fraud, or just a bike company making a living in a niche market? Wait for the next Rivendell blowtorch fest.

Brakes: After spending great effort to simply keep ourselves rolling forward at a satisfying speed, we periodically break the seal (pun intended again...I'm awful tonight) on a fight about the most satisfying way to screech to a halt.

Bling: "Real" cyclist or "Real" cyclist. Wait, I can't tell the difference! Prepare to fight for the moral high ground derived from a level of technology and gear...or the complete lack thereof.

Brooks: A cousin of the Rivendell battle, this piece of cowhide stretched on a metal frame has loving followers and venomous detractors.

There are others, of course. Bike type, handlebars, and tires are always popular...but not really as heated. Helmets thrive more in A&S. What's possibly the most heated debate here?

Conduct: A bit of the driver, and a LOT of how you respond.

I have now successfully typed away several minutes while waiting to join some friends for dinner. Of course, as whimsical as this post is, it's not terribly off the mark...at least I don't think so.

Cheers!