internet stalker....
A (usually) tragic male in his late 30s - 40s who spends all his free time hiding from reality whilst he chases girls/women using Internet chat rooms. Will often have deep seated emotional problems and possible peadophile tendencies (as well as a much receded hairline). An artful groomer who is too ashamed of himself to go down a nightclub and meet women like the rest of humanity.

I'm 6ft 2" with a full head of hair. I drive a sports car and am extremely virile. What are you wearing? Huh Huh Huh.