I suppose I should explain my reaction.
Around here hardly a week goes by that they don't nail some ******* on pedophilia charges. Even in jest, the mention that one chases little girls is enough to launch a police investigation. My job at the library involves working with kids. That sort of thing would get me put on leave without pay for the duration of the investigation. Around here, no one jokes about such things.
I know what you meant--that I couldn't catch an adult on a bike. But it could easily be read differently.
You're right, that **** ain't funny.
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It's all downhill from here. Except the parts that are uphill.