"Perhaps the thing to do is to flip my handlebar right-side-up again, trade in my helmet for a Homburg, and ride like a gentleman... any advice?"

I should think a large iron ball with spikes in it, on the end of a piece of motorcycle chain, would take care of any bounders on Bromptons, should they dare to pull out in front of a Pootler going like a giddy kipper in search of buns.

We may have to lobby the UN to elevate the International Pootle Speed Limit, due to popular demand and the need to avoid wack-a-doo Bromptonauts... Or add a class of Competitive Pootling, leaving the Touring Pootle Class limit at 12 mph.

Heaven knows what we can do if a Bromptonaut posts a Pootle.