Originally Posted by rockmuncher
Don't forget that that stuff will go away if you let it go away
Indeed. Did you ever hear the one "everything I let go of has claw marks all over it"? Yes, I got down in there for awhile.
I'm an academic librarian, I help students do research for a living. Doing research about a problem in my life is second nature. Of course, two weeks in the hospital kept me away from the net, and then I basically stayed away from the issue for awhile, having some deeper instinct that what I needed was healing, not "information." At the six week point I had a doctor's appointment, and before the appointment I set about to get information about my injuries. That's when I got into the "20% of people die" and "Martha Graham's house of pelvic truth" and all that and my psyche was like a pond being assaulted by a sudden hale storm.
The other night I heard a "60 Minutes" interview with Jim Carey, the actor. He said we never learn anything until we're completely desperate. It's interesting to me to see that I posted this thread to this list on the 21st. My doctor's appointment was on the 22nd. Desperation does push us into new ways of being. Like asking for help from total strangers. Who become not total strangers in the process.
Originally Posted by rockmuncher
The only one who can guide your destiny is you, regardless of what anyone else might say. ... In a short time you will learn how to use the tiny little wins to your benefit. They will help you to identify the positive things in life that will help you get back on you feet. As you gather up more and more little wins you will be able to guage your progress on the road to recovery.
The doc released me to begin to put a bit of weight on the right leg, with crutches. And get active, at least with my upper body. In the past couple of days I've gone to the therapy pool, where I spend 30 minutes with a styrofoam noodle doing of all things ... cycling! The irony is almost more than I can bear, but in a good way. Today I expect the hurt to set in, but from lifting weights and re-establishing a relationship with my body. It's a little scary to see how droopy and lifeless my right leg looks, only after 7 weeks of not using it. But I know if it can go there in seven weeks, it can also go in the other direction (well, more slowly, for now). Little wins.
Thank you all so much for your messages. I'm having one of those remarkable Internet moments, where its greater public good, community, is so much more powerful than any combination of a million annoying spams and popups for products I never asked to need.
Be well. Ride. Ride one for me! For now.