The reason they are saying that is because they will not come out and say ship that frame back and well get you another one. That would leave them with a scratched frame they cant sell. If they can give you reimbursement or a product they are making out on the deal.
Tell them you would keep the frame if they are willing to sell you something you want for a nice discount (dont take advantage like crazy but make it a good deal) otherwise you prefer a new unscratched bike. Give them some options to choose from so it doesnt seem like you are a greedy american.