I love oatmeal.
In fact, I have an unwholesome relationship with oatmeal.

I buy bulk organic rolled oats from my local healthfood store.
It costs me $.59 a pound when I buy 25 pounds of it, and I can carry it on my bike.

I also buy a pound each of rolled barley, rye, wheat, triticale, and thick-rolled oats and mix them in with the regular rolled oats.
It makes for a slightly more interesing flavor and texture.

I put on a cup of hot water to boil in a small saucepan.
I add a cup of nonfat milk.
Just as it comes to a boil again, just barely, I put in a cup of my rolled grain mixture, cover it and turn it down to low.

A half an hour later I scoop it into a bowl, add three tablespoons of brown sugar, a sliced banana and about a cup of fresh nonfat milk, and then I have something halfway between a religious and a sexual experience.

Now some may wonder whether the guy has great religion or bad sex; or, just what does he DO with the oatmeal?
I'll leave it up to the reader's imagination.