Oh makeinu, you're the best! You start with what sounds like an honest question, and slowly drive everyone toward the abyss where madness lies.

As the creator of the most epic of all the bikeforums troll threads, the infamous

"breaking chain without a chain tool" thread, you're my new hero.

http://www.bikeforums.net/showthread.php?t=303648

(Seriously people, if you haven't read this one, set aside 10 minutes and go through it, it's probably the funniest thread on the forum, hands down.)