So one day I'm looking at my "energy bar" wrapper and it says 10g Protein and 50g Carbs and I think that sounds familiar so I go look at the bagels. Bagels taste better. Especially when you put stuff on them, but even when you don't.

You need a lot more water than energy drink. Nothing wrong with them as a portion of your liquid intake but they are not at all well balanced as a primary source of water.