Guys calm down.
Try to read between the lines.

This poor old guy is trying so hard to bash cyclists that he doesn't realize that he is screaming: "I wish I could be like them" at the top of his lungs.

Note his reference to "football". You see, he is trying to convey the image of a steak-eating manly man that rides his truck and probably has a beer-belly of steel like pro football players, and looks down on sissy bike riders in Lycra clothing.

The fact that he actually knows what Lycra is, and his misconception about Lycra's comfort means that he has made a feeble attempt to fit in one not so long ago.

On another note, I tend to agree with his point that it is rather ridicolous for all people to suddenly jump on their bikes and put on fancy clothing just because Tour de France is on. Then again I dunno if that's true, I don't live in Austin.