Originally Posted by
pacificaslim
That's because their (our) testosterone levels are dropping and they are also realizing that they can't compete with the younger males for the truly "hot" women anymore (unless they are stinking rich). So they rationalize things and pretend to convince themselves that they'd prefer a "good talker" or whatever. I'm lucky, my wife is still totally hot! (I'm lucky that she has many other great qualities in addition to that, but if she didn't have those I still would have probably been with her anyway and would just be more miserable all these years later, ha!).
Take out the word "just" and the answer is because they are men. It's in our DNA to be visual and to judge women on their appearance. Most of us also seek other qualities in women, but we can't ever get past treating them like sexual objects. It's just the way we are built. (gay men are the same, just towards other men: and thus the emphasis on physical looks and grooming and fashion in the gay community). I know it's not something you can truly understand since you aren't made like we are, but surely by your age you've figured out that this is not something that women are going to be able to change about men, right? (unless you start giving us secret hormone shots in our sleep!)
We are as limited as we allow ourselves to be, so I suppose this simplified answer works for some. Sure there are aspects of being a man that might be inherent in our nature but a good portion of our behavior is conditioned so it's a matter of questioning that and moving beyond what is archaic. Personally I like the idea of treating
everyone with respect and civility, it just seems to work very well. There's a time and place for everything, I just don't think letting the sexual perception of women dominate and influence my every interaction with them.