He he he, you saw the eBay thread. As much as a pink Schwinn is my dream bike, my current two bikes look badass, but inconspicuous enough, I think. Thanks BR and kurremkarm for the advice- it is something I've recommended to others before, and works well.
If looking like a man fails to do the trick, there is always the "look and act as ****ing crazy as you can and hope to scare someone away" approach, right?