On the ride in this morning, I was thinking about an A&S thread I contributed to yesterday, and thinking I should have recommended a mirror. Then my mind wondered some more, and I came up with this little poem:
Not quite as easy as haiku, but anyone else want to give it a try?

Car, car in my lane
why are you being such a pain?
Roll down the window so I can say,
Please go the **** away!

Hill, hill in my way,
just another dragon to slay.
No I'm too tired, ride around
I'll see you another day.

Radar, radar on the net,
You keep me informed and from getting wet.
I shoot the gaps between the green,
Thanks for keeping my dry and clean.

green yellow and red.
if I were to run it, i'd surely be dead.
so I stay and wait, and wait and wait
like a motocross racer at the starting gate.

Rabbit, Rabbit, Squirrel, Bird,
Drat I ran through a cow tur*.
Just missed the deer that crossed my path,
I think its time to take a bath.

Biker, biker, going fast.
I think I have just been passed.
Any faster up this hill,
I think I will feel quite ill.

Ride, RIDE, against the changing of the light.
Do not pedal gently into that stale yellow.
Old age should burn in legs at close of day,
do not go gentle into the changing of the light.

Ride, RIDE, your bike valiant
against the changing of the light.
Wild men who campied and suntoured in flight,
but learn too late, to not go gentle into
the changing of the light.

Ride, RIDE, against the changing of the light.


...with due apologies to Dylan Thomas.

hello again, work
running nose and still sweating
time to roll down pants

OK, my turn.

First a little recognition where its due...Ever since Machka's thread (Winter biking forum?) on mastering the snot rocket, I would have a bit of music running through my mind. Remember "Afternoon Delight" by the Starland Vocal Band? There's a line, "Skyrockets in flight" I kept thinking, "Snot rockets in flight..." It wasn't until this thread by John Brookings that I actually put pen to paper.

To the tune of "Afternoon Delight" by the Starland Vocal Band, I bring you, "Winter's Day Delight". Top this one folks:

Gonna find my bike, gonna hold her tight
‘Cause my ride's gonna be a winter’s day delight!
My motto's always been; a bright winter day is right.
So why wait until the middle of a cold dark night.
When everything's a little clearer in the light of day.
And you know the night is always gonna be there any way.

Snot rockets in flight. Winter's day delight. Winter's day delight.

Thinkin' of ridin’s workin' up my appetite
looking forward to a little winter's day delight.
Putting rubber on the pavement will make the sparks ingite
and the thought of riding is getting so exciting.

Snot rockets in flight. Winter's day delight. Winter's day delight.
Snot rockets in flight. Winter's day delight. Winter's day delight.



I also offer an oldie, but a goodie…

Birdie birdie in the sky,
Why’d you do that in my I?

I don’t worry, I don’t cry,
I’m just real happy cows don’t fly!

I just could not resist:

Once upon a century dreary, while I pedaled, weak and weary,
Over many a quaint and curious back road of forgotten lore,
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping,
As of someone gently rapping, rapping at my seat so sore.
" Tis some chain link worn," I muttered, "causing tapping at my seat so sore”;
Only this, and nothing more."

Ah, distinctly I remember, it was in the bleak December,
And each separate tree in passing wrought its ghost upon the road.
Eagerly I wished the for tissue; vainly I had forgot to issue,
From my nose there was an issue, an issue that was soon to bode,.
From my red and radiant muzzle, there was soon trouble sure to bode,
Shamed I knew, it would not hold.

And each worn link’s bad uncertain, skipping kept me in the hurtin’,
Thrilled me---filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before;
So that now to still the beating, of my chain I stood repeating,
" 'Tis some gravel entreating entrance at my freewheel teeth,
Some noxious gravel entreating entrance at my precious freewheel teeth.
This it is, and not a leaf."

Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,
I looked around and there was no one’s forgiveness to implore;
So the fact is, I was chapping, and my strength it kept on tapping,
And so I greatly loosed the issue, to the windless side of me,
That I scarce was sure I did it, but my breathing now was free,
Now to find somewhere to pee.